42: The Election of 1800

The election of eighteen-hundred
Can we get back to politics?
yo
Every action has its equal, opposite reaction
John Adams shat the bed, I love the guy, but he’s in traction
Poor Alexander Hamilton, he is missing in action
So now I’m facing (Aaron Burr) with his own faction
He’s very attractive in the North, New Yorkers like his chances
He’s not very forthcoming on any particular stances
Ask him a question, it glances off, he obfuscates, he dances
And they say I’m a Francophile, at least they know I know where France is
Thomas that’s the problem, see, they see Burr as a less extreme you (ha)
You need to change course, a key endorsement might redeem you
Who did you have in mind?
Don’t laugh
Who is it?
You used to work on the same staff
(What?) it might be nice, it might be nice
To get Hamilton on your side
It might be nice, it might be nice
To get Hamilton on your side
Talk less (Burr!)
Smile more (Burr!)
Don’t let ’em know what you’re against or what you’re for (Burr!)
Shake hands with him (Burr!)
Charm her (Burr!)
It’s eighteen hundred, ladies, tell your husbands vote for (Burr!)
I don’t like Adams
Well, he’s gonna lose, that’s just defeatist
And Jefferson
In love with France
Yeah, he’s so elitist
I like that Aaron Burr
I can’t believe we’re here with him
He seems approachable?
Like you could grab a beer with him
Dear Mr. Hamilton
Your fellow Fed’ralists would like to know how you’ll be voting
(It’s quiet uptown) dear Mr. Hamilton
John Adams doesn’t stand a chance, so who are you promoting?
(It’s quiet uptown) Jefferson or Burr, Jefferson or Burr? we know it’s lose-lose
Jefferson or Burr? but if you had to choose 
Dear Mr. Hamilton
John Adams doesn’t stand a chance, so who are you promoting?
But if you had to choose
Well, if it isn’t Aaron Burr, sir?
Alexander
You’ve created quite a stir, sir
I’m going door to door
You’re openly campaigning?
Sure
That’s new
Honestly, it’s kind of draining
Burr
Sir!
Is there anything you wouldn’t do?
No I’m chasing what I want, and you know what?
What?
I learned that from you
If you had to choose
If you had to choose
It’s a tie
If you had to choose
If you had to choose
It’s up to the delegates
If you had to choose
If you had to choose
It’s up to Hamilton
If you had to choose
If you had to choose (Jefferson or Burr?)
If you had to choose, choose (Jefferson or Burr?)
Yo (oh!)
The people are asking to hear my voice (oh!)
For the country is facing a difficult choice (oh!)
And if you were to ask me who I’d promote (oh!)
Jefferson has my vote (oh!)
I have never agreed with Jefferson once (oh!)
We have fought on like seventy-five different fronts (oh!)
But when all is said and all is done 
Jefferson has beliefs, Burr has none (ooh!)
Well, I’ll be damned
Well, I’ll be damned
Hamilton’s on your side
Well, I’ll be damned
Well, I’ll be damned
And?
You won in a landslide!
Congrats on a race well-run
I did give you a fight 
Uh-huh?
I look forward to our partnership
Our partnership?
As your vice-President
Ha-ha-ha-ha, yeah, right
You hear this guy? 
Man openly campaigns against me, talkin’ bout “I look forward to our partnership”
It is crazy that the guy who comes in second gets to be vice-President
Ooh, you know what, we can change that, you know why? (why?) ’cause I’m the President!
Burr, when you see Hamilton, thank him for the endorsement